God of Stagnation

I sat there waiting for another version of me to come to the surface. I didn't poke or annoy, but I worry that I've angered myself. I could be relying too much on this idea of who I am that needs inspiration.

This piece is both an attempt to recognize the need to work and the rejection of inspiration. At times I feel as if I'm a make-up of a bunch of parts that don't make sense together. There I am sitting in a room watching myself and trying not to think too hard about anything in particular, especially not thinking too hard about thinking too hard. There is an absurdity to picking who you are in this life and I often can't relate to people who fall into a category of person. You've seen those people; the losers, the geeks, the jerks, the kind souls. Everyone seems to be content letting go of an agency within themselves to convey a finite image of themselves. I can't stand being any particular way for too long. It honestly drives me crazy. God of Stagnation are those moments where I fail and try to figure myself out. I try to give up that agency and become something recognizable. I don't get much done and I only feel complete once I've found one more thing to reject. Only then can I work and not think too hard about what I'm doing.